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[[File:Demiflag.png|thumb|220x220px|The demisexual flag.]] |
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[[File:Demiflag.png|thumb|220x220px|The demisexual flag.]][[File:Alternate demisexual flag.png|thumb|Alternate demisexual flag.]][[File:Alternate demisexual flag (2).jpg|thumb|Alternate demisexual flag.]] |
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'''Demisexual''' is a sexual orientation on the [[asexual spectrum]] defined as someone who does not experience [[sexual attraction]] until they have formed a deep emotional connection with someone. The connection can be [[Romantic Attraction|romantic]], [[Platonic Attraction|platonic]], or some other form of connection. Forming an emotional bond with someone does not mean that one is automatically attracted to said person, as it just means there's now a possibility for one to feel attraction. |
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[[File:39BB39B9-9C20-4381-A759-9F8DA5B63B83.jpg|thumb|Alternate demisexual flag.]] |
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[[File:Demisexual2 flag.png|thumb|Alternate demisexual flag by Tumblr user crimsxnflxwerz.]] |
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[[File:Alternate Demisexual flag.png|alt=Alternate Demisexual flag|thumb|Alternate Demisexual flag]] |
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[[File:Demisexual Symbol.png|thumb|Demisexual Symbol.]] |
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'''Demisexual''' is a [[sexual orientation]] on the [[asexual spectrum]] defined as someone who does not experience [[sexual attraction]] until they have formed a close or deep emotional connection or bond with someone.<ref name=":0">https://demisexuality.org/articles/what-is-demisexuality/</ref> It is sometimes defined as one who only experiences secondary sexual attraction.<ref>https://web.archive.org/web/20220713031303/https://glaad.org/amp/ace-guide-finding-your-community</ref> |
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Demisexuality may be considered a type of [[greysexual|Greysexuality]], [[Mesi Asexual|Mesi Asexuality]], and/or [[aliquasexual|Aliquasexuality.]]<ref>https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gray_asexuality#Demisexuality</ref> |
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It is important to distinguish between typical sexual attraction to friends and romantic partners, and demisexuality, which implies that there would be no sexual attraction to anyone unless a close relationship was to be established. The already existing relationship is the only way a demisexual person would be able to experience sexual attraction. Being sexually attracted to one's close friends does not necessarily mean that one is demisexual, for example. |
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Counterparts for other forms of attraction include: [[Demiromantic]], [[Demiplatonic]], [[Demisensual]], [[Demialterous]], and [[Flectic|Demiflectic]], among others. |
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[[File:Alternate demisexual flag.png|thumb|Alternate demisexual flag]]Demisexual can be a sexual orientation on its own or can be combined with other orientations. For example, one could be demisexual and [[polysexual]] ([[demipolysexual]]), meaning that when one does experience sexual attraction they can experience it towards multiple genders, but not all genders. |
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Demisexuality is sometimes described as the "opposite" orientation to [[Fraysexual|Fraysexuality]] (sexual attraction that fades when an emotional bond is formed). One who is both Demisexual and Fraysexual may or may not use the term [[Apexsexual]]. |
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[[File:Alternate demisexual flag (2).jpg|thumb|Another alternate demisexual flag.]]Counterparts to demisexual include [[demiromantic]], [[demiplatonic]], and [[demialterous]]. |
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== Primary and Secondary Sexual Attraction Model == |
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Primary Sexual attraction is sexual attraction based on information which is instantly available, such as appearance, voice, smell, or fashion. |
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Secondary Sexual attraction is is sexual attraction based on information which is not instantly available. This includes personality, experiences, talents, and similar factors.<ref>http://wiki.asexuality.org/Primary_vs._secondary_sexual_attraction_model</ref> |
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The Primary and Secondary Sexual Attraction Model was created by AVEN user Rabger on September 2nd, 2005 to address perceived issues with AVEN's then-current definition of Asexuality. |
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Benefits of the model over the older definition is the distinction of Demisexuals from both Allosexuals and [[Black Stripe Asexual|Black Stripe Asexuals]], something not taken into account by the previous AVEN standard.<ref>http://wiki.asexuality.org/Primary_vs._secondary_sexual_attraction_model</ref> |
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== Emotional Bonds == |
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The emotional bond a Demisexual forms can be [[Romantic Attraction|Romantic]], [[Platonic Attraction|Platonic]], or any other type of connection. What counts as a "close/deep bond" varies between individuals. |
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It may take several years to develop or it may form more suddenly (i.e. sharing an intense experience with someone over a week may cause a bond to form) |
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Some common factors for Demisexuals forming bonds are: |
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* Emotional intimacy |
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* Familiarity |
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* Knowledge (of an individual's personality, beliefs, past, etc.) |
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* Shared experiences |
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However, it is important to note that the formation of any emotional bond(s) does not mean a Demisexual person will automatically feel sexual attraction towards said individual(s). It is simply a prerequisite for the possibility of sexual attraction to occur.<ref name=":0" /><ref>https://thedemisexual.com/being-demisexual/</ref> |
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== Misconceptions == |
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There are many misconceptions about Demisexuals and the Demisexual label. Demisexuality is not celibacy, a moral choice, "being picky", caused by a fear of sex, or an issue with low sex drive or hormones.<ref>https://asexualitytrust.org.nz/what-is-asexuality/demisexuality-and-demiromanticism/</ref><ref>https://thedemisexual.com/purity-culture-and-demisexuality/</ref><ref>https://thedemisexual.com/demisexual-or-just-picky/</ref> |
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Demisexuals may choose to have casual sex or sex without attraction, [[Sex Stances|sex stances]] vary from individual to individual just like any other orientation.<ref>https://thedemisexual.com/do-demisexuals-have-sex/#How_do_Demisexuals_Feel_About_Sex</ref> While some Demisexuals may prefer sex with attraction, this is not a rule or a requirement to be Demisexual.<ref>http://wiki.asexuality.org/Demisexual#Common_Misconceptions</ref> |
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Similar to other orientations, Demisexuals may have any romantic orientation (Demisexual [[Homoromantic]], Demisexual [[Aromantic]], etc.) They may also choose not to use the Split-attraction Model ( or identify as a [[Non-SAM Ace]].)<ref>https://thedemisexual.com/just-demisexual/#Can_I_be_demisexual_and_gay_bi_pan_etc</ref> |
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They may also choose to use additional sexual orientation labels alongside Demisexual (Demisexual [[Gay|Homosexual]], Demisexual [[Bisexual]], etc.) if they wish.<ref>https://thedemisexual.com/demisexuality-bisexuality/</ref> Some Demisexuals are simply "just Demisexual".<ref>https://thedemisexual.com/just-demisexual/#Can_I_just_be_demisexual</ref> |
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== Identities == |
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Some examples of identities and microlabels relating to demisexuality include: |
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* [[Demisexualspike]] |
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* [[Sequencesexual]] |
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* [[Dellosexual]] |
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* [[Communicosexual]] (in some cases) |
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* [[Demipleasure]] |
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* [[Apressexual]] |
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* [[Encephalosexual]] |
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* [[Amantesexual]] |
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*[[Koinikosexual|Koinosexual]] |
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*[[Apexsexual]] |
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*[[Vallissexual]] |
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== History == |
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The term demisexual was coined in 2006 on the AVEN forms by user sonofzeal, who described his experience of not being sexually attracted to individuals without first forming an emotional connection. Sonofzeal felt neither [[asexual]] nor allosexual and created the term to more accurately describe needing an emotional bond as a prerequisite to sexual attraction. The term started to gain widespread popularity in 2008.<ref>{{Archive|Site=web|URL=https://feeld.co/blog/feeld-guides/definition-demisexual}}</ref> |
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== Flag == |
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Demisexuality is included in the Asexual [[Pride Flag|pride flag]]'s Grey stripe along with Greysexuality.<ref name=":1">http://wiki.asexuality.org/Asexual_flag#Symbolism</ref> |
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The Demisexual flag was made by Wikimedia user Vimopu, who uploaded it on April 22nd, 2013.<ref>https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Demisexual_Flag.jpg</ref> |
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While no meanings were given by Vimopu, the same colors as the Asexual flag are used and are often assumed to have the same or similar meanings. |
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* '''Black:''' Asexuality |
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* '''Grey:''' Gray-A and demisexuality |
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* '''White:''' Allosexual partners and allies |
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* '''Purple''': Community<ref name=":1" /> |
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The third alternate demisexual flag was designed by tumblr user crimsxnflxwerz on August 2, 2018.<ref>https://www.tumblr.com/crimsxnflxwerz/176552753131/i-was-thinking-of-ways-to-redesign-the-demisexual</ref> |
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== Etymology == |
== Etymology == |
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The prefix demi- means half or partial. |
The prefix demi- means half or partial.<ref>https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/demi-</ref> |
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== Resources == |
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[[Category:Ace-spec identity]] |
[[Category:Ace-spec identity]] |
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<references />{{Archive|Site=web|URL=https://crimsxnflxwerz.tumblr.com/post/176552753131/i-was-thinking-of-ways-to-redesign-the-demisexual}} |
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[[Category:Demi- Orientation]] |
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[[Category:Needs Resource Verification]] |
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Latest revision as of 16:00, 23 November 2023
.jpg)
Demisexual is a sexual orientation on the asexual spectrum defined as someone who does not experience sexual attraction until they have formed a close or deep emotional connection or bond with someone.[1] It is sometimes defined as one who only experiences secondary sexual attraction.[2]
Demisexuality may be considered a type of Greysexuality, Mesi Asexuality, and/or Aliquasexuality.[3]
Counterparts for other forms of attraction include: Demiromantic, Demiplatonic, Demisensual, Demialterous, and Demiflectic, among others.
Demisexuality is sometimes described as the "opposite" orientation to Fraysexuality (sexual attraction that fades when an emotional bond is formed). One who is both Demisexual and Fraysexual may or may not use the term Apexsexual.
Primary and Secondary Sexual Attraction Model
Primary Sexual attraction is sexual attraction based on information which is instantly available, such as appearance, voice, smell, or fashion.
Secondary Sexual attraction is is sexual attraction based on information which is not instantly available. This includes personality, experiences, talents, and similar factors.[4]
The Primary and Secondary Sexual Attraction Model was created by AVEN user Rabger on September 2nd, 2005 to address perceived issues with AVEN's then-current definition of Asexuality.
Benefits of the model over the older definition is the distinction of Demisexuals from both Allosexuals and Black Stripe Asexuals, something not taken into account by the previous AVEN standard.[5]
Emotional Bonds
The emotional bond a Demisexual forms can be Romantic, Platonic, or any other type of connection. What counts as a "close/deep bond" varies between individuals.
It may take several years to develop or it may form more suddenly (i.e. sharing an intense experience with someone over a week may cause a bond to form)
Some common factors for Demisexuals forming bonds are:
- Emotional intimacy
- Familiarity
- Knowledge (of an individual's personality, beliefs, past, etc.)
- Shared experiences
However, it is important to note that the formation of any emotional bond(s) does not mean a Demisexual person will automatically feel sexual attraction towards said individual(s). It is simply a prerequisite for the possibility of sexual attraction to occur.[1][6]
Misconceptions
There are many misconceptions about Demisexuals and the Demisexual label. Demisexuality is not celibacy, a moral choice, "being picky", caused by a fear of sex, or an issue with low sex drive or hormones.[7][8][9]
Demisexuals may choose to have casual sex or sex without attraction, sex stances vary from individual to individual just like any other orientation.[10] While some Demisexuals may prefer sex with attraction, this is not a rule or a requirement to be Demisexual.[11]
Similar to other orientations, Demisexuals may have any romantic orientation (Demisexual Homoromantic, Demisexual Aromantic, etc.) They may also choose not to use the Split-attraction Model ( or identify as a Non-SAM Ace.)[12]
They may also choose to use additional sexual orientation labels alongside Demisexual (Demisexual Homosexual, Demisexual Bisexual, etc.) if they wish.[13] Some Demisexuals are simply "just Demisexual".[14]
Identities
Some examples of identities and microlabels relating to demisexuality include:
- Demisexualspike
- Sequencesexual
- Dellosexual
- Communicosexual (in some cases)
- Demipleasure
- Apressexual
- Encephalosexual
- Amantesexual
- Koinosexual
- Apexsexual
- Vallissexual
History
The term demisexual was coined in 2006 on the AVEN forms by user sonofzeal, who described his experience of not being sexually attracted to individuals without first forming an emotional connection. Sonofzeal felt neither asexual nor allosexual and created the term to more accurately describe needing an emotional bond as a prerequisite to sexual attraction. The term started to gain widespread popularity in 2008.[15]
Flag
Demisexuality is included in the Asexual pride flag's Grey stripe along with Greysexuality.[16]
The Demisexual flag was made by Wikimedia user Vimopu, who uploaded it on April 22nd, 2013.[17]
While no meanings were given by Vimopu, the same colors as the Asexual flag are used and are often assumed to have the same or similar meanings.
- Black: Asexuality
- Grey: Gray-A and demisexuality
- White: Allosexual partners and allies
- Purple: Community[16]
The third alternate demisexual flag was designed by tumblr user crimsxnflxwerz on August 2, 2018.[18]
Etymology
The prefix demi- means half or partial.[19]
Resources
- ↑ 1.0 1.1 https://demisexuality.org/articles/what-is-demisexuality/
- ↑ https://web.archive.org/web/20220713031303/https://glaad.org/amp/ace-guide-finding-your-community
- ↑ https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gray_asexuality#Demisexuality
- ↑ http://wiki.asexuality.org/Primary_vs._secondary_sexual_attraction_model
- ↑ http://wiki.asexuality.org/Primary_vs._secondary_sexual_attraction_model
- ↑ https://thedemisexual.com/being-demisexual/
- ↑ https://asexualitytrust.org.nz/what-is-asexuality/demisexuality-and-demiromanticism/
- ↑ https://thedemisexual.com/purity-culture-and-demisexuality/
- ↑ https://thedemisexual.com/demisexual-or-just-picky/
- ↑ https://thedemisexual.com/do-demisexuals-have-sex/#How_do_Demisexuals_Feel_About_Sex
- ↑ http://wiki.asexuality.org/Demisexual#Common_Misconceptions
- ↑ https://thedemisexual.com/just-demisexual/#Can_I_be_demisexual_and_gay_bi_pan_etc
- ↑ https://thedemisexual.com/demisexuality-bisexuality/
- ↑ https://thedemisexual.com/just-demisexual/#Can_I_just_be_demisexual
- ↑ https://web.archive.org/web/https://feeld.co/blog/feeld-guides/definition-demisexual
- ↑ 16.0 16.1 http://wiki.asexuality.org/Asexual_flag#Symbolism
- ↑ https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Demisexual_Flag.jpg
- ↑ https://www.tumblr.com/crimsxnflxwerz/176552753131/i-was-thinking-of-ways-to-redesign-the-demisexual
- ↑ https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/demi-
