Adexsexual is an ace-spec greysexual microlabel where a person is internally allo but ace externally.
Adexsexuals find some people sexually attractive and arousing in the fantasy/idea of having sex with them yourself. It fades when actually focusing on them IRL, next to you. Focusing on the idea again/going away restores it.
Adexsexual traits
- Allo-ish when alone, can fantasize/watch/read about sex in first POV and enjoy and want it.
- The more IRL/tangible the external partner becomes, the more ace-ish you get.
- Allosexuality naturally suppressed by presence of IRL people, even the ones you fantasize about.
- Allosexuality NOT suppressed by the presence of self, unlike in Aegosexuality.
- Actual sex can be very difficult and feel like a job, even if it is somewhat enjoyable, it doesn't compare to the expectation.
- Can desire sex with someone if they have an idea of it at a distance but in front of that person that desire is gone.
- Doesn't depend on reciprocity of Other, only on the presence of Other.
- Capable of being allo-ish a bit even during sex if dissociating strongly or experiencing kinks and trying to ignore the person next to you.
The romantic/aesthetic/sensual/platonic equvalents are adexromantic/adexaesthetic/adexsensual/adexplatonic.
Etymology
Ad (almost) + Ex (externally) + Sexual means "approaching external sexuality". Term coined by u/throwaceornotaceblob on Reddit on November 9, 2021.
Flag
The adexsexual flag was designed by u/throwaceornotaceblob on Reddit on November 9, 2021. The internal crimson rhombus represents internal sexuality that dissipates the more external it gets. The outer purple boundaries represent the external asexuality. The dark rose remaining color represents phantom sexuality or sexual disconnect.